Stories from Women about No/Weak Orgasms

It was rare for my husband and me to have sex. It bothered him and certainly bothered me.

My lack of desire began when my son was born 13 years ago. A few months after his birth, I went to my gynecologist and told him I had lost my desire to have sex with my husband. He told me that having a baby was causing a hormonal imbalance and that it would get better. It never did. This is how my long and frustrating journey began. It finally ended 13 years later when I found The Medical Center for Female Sexuality.

After my first gynecologist didn't help me, I decided to see a different gynecologist for a second opinion. He told me that I didn't desire sex with my husband because there was a problem with my marriage. "Hmmm," I thought. "Maybe he's right." How could I love my husband when I didn't sexually desire him? I even thought I might be gay because my sister is. I was trying to come up with any solution that would explain why I had lost my desire for sex. This led to thoughts about divorce because I couldn't live like this.

Through all of this, my husband was one in a million. I am surprised he stuck it out for so long. Most men would have probably had an affair during 13 years of living in a marriage without passion. I still don't know how he put up with me.

Oddly enough, my solution began with Dr. Phil. The show featured a young married woman with a lack of sexual desire. She sounded just like me. The show concluded that she was suffering from low testosterone and that could cause a loss of interest in sex. Maybe I was grasping at straws but this could be the answer I had wanted for so long. Maybe it wasn't my marriage.

I immediately went on the Internet to search for someone to help me. That's how I found the Women's Center. I immediately called the Center to make an appointment.

I was so hopeful that this might be the solution I needed, but my husband wasn't so sure. He thought we were going into therapy and he doesn't trust therapy. I told him I didn't think we were going to make it if we didn't get help, so he reluctantly came to my first visit.

When we arrived at the Center, I met with Bat Sheva and Melissa and told them about my situation. They also met with my husband to talk to him about what was going on. After meeting with them, I had a physical exam and blood tests. I made another appointment 3 weeks later and they said they would have the results of all of my tests.

For those 3 weeks, I was so nervous. I wanted my testosterone to be low because otherwise, my marriage was in trouble. If this didn't work, the only other answer was to leave my husband.

When I went back 3 weeks later, the results of my tests showed that not only was my testosterone low, but I had none. Finally, after searching for 13 years, I knew what was wrong. It wasn't my marriage or my husband. I wasn't crazy, it was physical. What a relief! They put together a regimen of hormones and other medication and the change was almost instant. It had been so long since I had had any sexual desire, I forgot what it felt like.

My life has changed dramatically since my first appointment. I haven't thought about divorce once. My husband is happy because I finally desire him again, after all this time. The Women's Center truly saved my marriage.

I don't know if treatment works this quickly and effectively for everyone, but for me, it was amazing.

L
Age 50

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