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How to Find the Right Lubricant

March 2010

There are as many different lubricants as there are types of ... shampoos. And like shampoos everyone ends up with their very own favorite. And never, ever, argue with a woman about why her favorite brand of shampoo is inferior to your favorite brand. Believe me, it will end up very ugly, quickly.

But lubricants are important to your love life. Nearly every woman, at some point in her life, will find that her body doesn't lubricate enough to make intercourse comfortable or enough for her to feel really good. Some women need it early on in their sex life while they are learning what sex is all about and what turns them on. Some women find that after childbirth or while they are nursing their lubrication just isn't what it used to be and some women find that as they get older they aren't necessarily making the same lubrication they did when they were younger. And that is when a good lubricant can make all the difference. So it's probably worth the time to try to find a lubricant that you really like.

So how do you find that perfect lube? Well, here are some things to keep in mind:

  • Lubricants come in a variety of textures that vary from more "liquidy" to more "creamy." In general, women tend to like the ones that stay liquidy longer and often find that the creamy ones get sticky and "tacky" over time. However, you need to experiment with what feels good. Wet Platinum is clear, silicone based and silky, while Astro Glide is a bit more liquid. Liquid Silk is creamier, whitish and a bit thicker.
  • If you are prone to yeast infections, you will want stay away from glycerin. A number of good glycerin-free lubricants are made by O'My and Kama Sutra. If you find that you get yeast infections a lot, switch to one of these and see if the situation improves. Firefly Organics also makes a fragrance free, irritant free lubricant that's very popular (but don't use it with latex condoms - it can eat away at the latex.)
  • Don't ever use Vaseline with a condom... unless of course you really have an unconscious urge to have a baby. Latex condoms get eaten away by petroleum jelly. Also, be careful using silicone lubricants regularly with sex toys. If they are used consistently, the sex toys may start to "melt away."
  • Flavored lubricants can be a fun way to enhance your love life. Many really fine lubricants now come in flavors. Search Karma Sutra and O'My for some nice choices. Believe it or not, they come in all kinds of nifty flavors like pina colada and mango orange, as well as the good oldies like cherry and vanilla!

So get out there and find yourself a lubrication that works. Keep it by your bed and enjoy!


MCFS Book Recommendation

Hot Monogamy - Essential Steps to More Passionate, Intimate Lovemaking., Love P. and Robinson J. (1995) New York: Plume Books

Ok, we're busted. We recommend this book at least twice a year since many of our readers are in committed relationships and are looking for ways to keep the fire burning. Don't let the date dissuade you [was 1995 really 15 years ago?], this book is as contemporary and relevant in 2010 as it was then.

Happy Reading!

Amazon


About the Center

While we think of these newsletters as a place to offer words of advice and perspective on sexual health, lately we've been getting inquiries that ask, well, what are we, exactly?

So here's the short version:

MCFS is a specialty medical practice in existence nearly 11 years, with two offices in the New York area. We see and counsel women from all over the country through our local and out of town programs.

The reason women are willing to either travel to see us or arrange for a phone consult is because they've already been to their local gynecologist to discuss low desire, pain, orgasm issues, persistent arousal disorders or other matters related to sexual health; and they have not been helped.

Either a doctor dismisses the conditions as unimportant ("Just relax, have a glass of wine"), cannot find anything "wrong," ("Everything's fine. I don't see anything. It's just what women your age go through."), or they simply have not developed the skills and experience necessary to successfully treat these problems.

In fact, many of our patients are sent to us by their own OB/GYN.

While we cannot diagnose or treat medical conditions over the phone, we do have a great office staff who can answer general questions about appointments, insurance and scheduling. There are also programs in place for people who contact us from out of our local area.

Spring is around the corner: make it a good one by beginning with your own health and happiness.

If you'd like to write an anonymous testimonial reflecting your experience at the Center, please feel free to send it to info@centerforfemalesexuality.com

Help women like you have the courage to help themselves!


 

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Bat Sheva Marcus, LCSW, MpH, PhD, Clinical Director

 

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MCFS News

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How to find the right lubricant for you

Quote of the Month
"The good thing about masturbation is that you don't have to get dressed up for it. "

Truman Capote
Why Women See Us
"When I look back at my sex life 5 months ago, it makes my head spin. Frankly, I really didn't care about having sex... at all or ever again. ....

Now it's five months later... and I learned not only that there was an explanation for my lack of desire, but that there were things we could do about it! "
~C., 40

"Going to the MCFS was one of the most important "gifts" I ever gave myself."
~A., 48
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Success Stories
"I hated the way I was acting and I missed enjoying my sex life, but I just didn't know what to do. When my OB suggested I go to the Medical Center I was a little bit intimidated. Talking about my sex life was not my favorite thing. " ~S., 35

"Until I came to the Center I never would have believed that there was a medical solution to my problems. Throughout the entire process I felt like Melissa and Bat Sheva were my friends as well as my doctors. They have saved me and saved my marriage."

~ K, 45
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