Monthly Newsletter

Most women ( hovering somewhere around 96%) can have orgasms. There is a direct correlation between ability to experience orgasm and sexual satisfaction (as most women who have them will generally assure you.) The corollary, that the inability to achieve orgasm lowers a woman's level sexual satisfaction, is also true.

There have been numerous books that try to describe what women (and men) feel during orgasm. Strikingly, although the descriptions vary widely, there is a great deal of overlap between the descriptions given by men and women. This leads me to my general principal that no two orgasms may be alike but that they do not differentiate by gender!

So what actually is happening when a woman experiences orgasm? During the excitement phase, when a woman become "turned on" typically her breast swell up, her nipples become erect and her uterus tips downward. At this point additional stimulation to her clitoris, vulva, and vagina will bring on general body tension and will increase blood flow to the vulvar/vaginal area. As the blood keeps building in the vulvar/vaginal area, a woman will experience her genitals as tense and tight.

This feeling, often accompanied by tingling, swelling and wetness is generally experienced as pleasurable. During this time a woman is also receiving neurological stimulation. The nerve endings in her clitoris, vagina and vulva are being stimulated and are experiencing greater and greater stimulation.

At the point where the stimulation reaches a crescendo, the nerves "shoot off" to release tension. A series of involuntary contractions occur in response. The contractions, which occur in the uterus and vagina, carry the blood away from the genitals and back to the rest of the body (unless she tries to have another orgasm). Most women experience this resolution time as one where tension fades away and there is a general relaxed feeling in the genitals.

There is no such thing as a "clitoral" or a "vaginal" orgasm. There are orgasms. Period. Some women enjoy stimulation more in one part of their genitals than other parts. Some women have more nerve endings in one part of their genitals than other parts. No orgasm is "better" than another and there is no evidence that one type of orgasm is more intense than another! However, wherever and with whomever you choose to have an orgasm, enjoy yourself. They are good for you, helping to bring blood into the vaginal area, keeping your vagina moist and supple and they are relaxing. Best of all, they feel great!

Happy Orgasm!

MCFS Book Recommendation

She Comes First: A thinking man's guide to pleasuring a woman, Ian Kerner, PhD

Some may read this book and shout "TMI!!!"

Yes, there is a lot of information in this book that may make us uncomfortable. Just considering an entire book on pleasuring a woman makes some of us squeamish. And then there's the painstakingly detailed "how to" that really feels clinical but still makes the reader perspire while reading it.

But the problem is probably us, not the book. If you have a partner who is dedicated to exploring your mysterious and complex body, and producing make-no-mistake-about-it orgasms, this may indeed be exactly the right book.

Father's Day, perhaps?

Happy Reading!

Barnes and Noble

Amazon