Understanding Female Sexuality

To the men visiting this site:

Did you ever hear the expression, "It takes two to tango?"  That's why we have a section of this website specifically for men.

What a quandary we are in when the women we care about have difficulty with sex.  They are unhappy, we are unhappy.  And life is just too short to accept that as the status quo.

Chances are, your wife, partner or girlfriend has not seen a professional about this.  Only about 18% of women actually do seek medical help when experiencing sexual dysfunction of any kind.  Most women feel they cannot do anything about it, they've tried everything, it's their (or your) fault.

Some women may have sought help and were told any number of insulting and upsetting things by well-meaning health care professionals:

• It's all in your head
• You must be depressed (who wouldn't be?!)
• It's just a fact of life with menopause
• You're young and inexperienced. Just relax.

Our center, and this website, are here to help you help the woman in your life learn about female sexual dysfunction, its causes and treatment possibilities.  It also serves to help her - and you - feel less alone,  to feel reassured that there are many couples dealing with this each day, and to know that there are solutions to help you regain a satisfying sex life.

The focus of our practice is to explore the possible physical causes of female sexual dysfunction, hand in hand with what's happening emotionally.  Once physical causes can be identified, treatments can be prescribed and results achieved in a matter of months in many cases.

Things you can do to learn more

• Use our website to learn about the different kinds of female sexual dysfunction
• Read the stories of real women and how they overcame some of the toughest problems with sexual dysfunction
• Get the terminology down for female anatomy

Advice for talking to your partner about female sexual dysfunction

If you've ever had an issue with your own sexual dysfunction, however temporary, you probably remember how it felt to face your partner when the unimaginable happened.  Well, it's not much different for her.

And often it can be worse:  pain and discomfort, even a complete inability to have intercourse, the frustration of never having an orgasm, not ever feeling like having sex, wanting to but being unable….these are dreary days for a couple navigating such a web of issues and problems.

Here are some things you can tell your partner to open the conversation:

• Reassure her that you're here to stay and want to be part of the solution
• Tell her you've heard of websites (not just ours; see our reference page) that are very educational, and where you can hear the voices of real women struggling with and overcoming these problems
• Treatment isn't always a years-long project with a psychotherapist.  Though sometimes traditional talk therapy can be very effective, examining the physical conditions that coexist with psychological and relationship-based issues may open the door to the possibility of rapid solutions
• Help her research ways for the two of you to work on the problem together

Start with the tab on the left to begin learning more about female sexuality and dysfunction.  You're one of the good guys who cares, so give yourself a pat on the back and get started!

Michael Werner, M.D.
Medical Director
MCFS

Read about male sexual dysfunction